Infidelity Statistics: How Common Is Cheating in Marriage? (2026 Research & Data)
Few topics in relationships generate as much anxiety, curiosity, and confusion as infidelity. Whether you're worried about your own marriage, recovering from betrayal, or simply trying to understand the landscape of modern relationships, having accurate data matters. This comprehensive guide examines what research actually tells us about cheating in marriage—and what it means for couples today.
How Common Is Infidelity in Marriage?
The headlines would have you believe that infidelity is an epidemic destroying half of all marriages. The reality, while still significant, is more nuanced.
According to data from the General Social Survey, approximately 20% of married men and 13% of married women report having had sex with someone other than their spouse while married. This finding has remained remarkably consistent across multiple studies and decades of research.
The often-cited claim that "half of all marriages experience infidelity" is overstated. When we look at rigorous research, approximately 20-25% of marriages experience physical infidelity at some point during the relationship.
However, when we expand the definition to include emotional affairs—romantic connections that don't involve physical intimacy—the numbers climb significantly. Research suggests that 45% of men and 35% of women have engaged in some form of emotional infidelity during their marriage. This distinction matters because 64% of couples report that an emotional affair can be just as damaging, or even more harmful, than a physical one.
Who Cheats More: Men or Women?
The data consistently shows that men are more likely to cheat than women, though this gap has narrowed over time.
Overall rates:
Men: 20% report extramarital sex
Women: 13% report extramarital sex
But these averages hide important variations across age groups.
Infidelity by Age
Among younger married adults (ages 18-29), women are actually slightly more likely to cheat than men (11% vs. 10%). This represents a significant shift from previous generations.
The gender gap reverses and widens with age:
Ages 30-39: Men begin cheating at higher rates
Ages 50-59: Peak infidelity years—28% of men and 17% of women report cheating
Ages 70+: Men report the highest rates (26%), while women's rates decline to around 6%
This age pattern suggests that infidelity isn't simply about opportunity or character—it's influenced by life stage, relationship duration, and generational attitudes toward marriage and sexuality.
The Rise of Emotional Affairs
Perhaps the most significant shift in infidelity patterns involves emotional affairs—intimate connections that may not involve physical contact but create the same sense of betrayal.
Research reveals striking numbers:
91.6% of women admit to having had an emotional affair at some point
78.6% of men report the same
The workplace remains the most common breeding ground for affairs of all types. Studies show that 31% of affairs begin with coworkers, and the likelihood increases dramatically with corporate rank:
Non-management employees: 9% report workplace affairs
Middle management: 24%
Upper management: 37%
This pattern likely reflects increased travel, long hours, and the intense bonds that form during high-pressure work situations—factors that create both opportunity and emotional vulnerability.
Social media has introduced new complexities. While there isn't strong evidence that overall infidelity rates have increased dramatically, the nature of emotional affairs has changed. Digital communication makes it easier to maintain secret connections, blur boundaries, and rationalize inappropriate relationships as "just friendship."
What Causes Infidelity?
Understanding why people cheat is essential for prevention—and for healing when affairs do occur. Research points to several consistent factors.
Relationship Factors
The strongest predictors of infidelity relate to the quality of the primary relationship:
Lack of emotional intimacy: Partners who feel emotionally disconnected are more vulnerable to seeking connection elsewhere
Sexual dissatisfaction: Though notably, this predicts male infidelity more strongly than female infidelity
Unresolved conflict: Chronic resentment and unaddressed issues create distance
Poor communication: Couples who struggle to discuss needs, feelings, and concerns are at higher risk
This is why developing strong communication skills is one of the most protective factors against infidelity—and why addressing communication patterns is central to effective couples therapy.
Individual Factors
Some individual characteristics are associated with higher infidelity rates:
Attachment style: Those with avoidant or anxious attachment patterns cheat more frequently
History of infidelity: Past cheating is one of the strongest predictors of future cheating
Attitudes toward infidelity: Those who view cheating as somewhat acceptable are more likely to engage in it
Opportunity: Travel, work situations, and social environments that provide opportunity and anonymity
The Differentiation Factor
Research in differentiation-based approaches to couples therapy suggests that poorly differentiated individuals—those who struggle to maintain their sense of self while in close relationships—may be more vulnerable to affairs. When people depend on their partner for validation and self-worth, they become susceptible to seeking that validation elsewhere when the relationship hits inevitable rough patches.
This understanding forms the foundation of the Crucible Approach to couples therapy, which focuses on helping partners develop the internal stability needed to weather relationship challenges without seeking escape through infidelity.
Can Marriages Survive Infidelity?
This is the question that haunts both betrayed partners and those who have strayed. The research offers a complex but ultimately hopeful picture.
Overall Survival Rates
Multiple studies find that 60-75% of couples stay together after discovering an affair. This may surprise those who assume infidelity automatically ends a marriage.
However, "staying together" isn't the same as "thriving." When researchers use stricter definitions focused on genuine reconciliation—characterized by restored trust, emotional intimacy, and mutual satisfaction—the numbers look different. Some studies suggest that only 15-20% of couples achieve meaningful reconciliation five years after discovery.
The difference between these statistics highlights an important truth: surviving infidelity requires more than simply not divorcing. It requires genuine healing and rebuilding.
The Critical Role of Professional Help
This is where the data becomes particularly relevant for couples facing this crisis. Research consistently shows that professional intervention dramatically improves outcomes:
A 2012 AAMFT survey found that 74% of couples who underwent therapy after infidelity were able to recover and rebuild their relationship
Studies show that 60-80% of couples who work with a skilled therapist can rebuild trust and emerge with stronger marriages
Among the couples who stay together and do the work, 70% report higher marital satisfaction post-therapy than they had even before the affair
Compare this to couples who try to handle infidelity on their own: research suggests only 35-45% successfully reconcile without professional help.
Disclosure Matters
One of the most striking findings involves the impact of honest disclosure:
Couples who disclosed the affair and addressed it in therapy had a divorce rate of approximately 43% at five years (meaning 57% stayed together)
Couples who hid or minimized the affair had a divorce/separation rate of approximately 80% by five years (only 20% stayed together)
The implication is clear: while disclosure is painful, secrets are more destructive in the long run. This is one reason why skilled therapists help couples navigate the disclosure process carefully—balancing honesty with appropriate boundaries about details.
Factors That Predict Successful Recovery
Not all couples who seek help after infidelity will succeed. Research has identified several factors that distinguish couples who rebuild from those who ultimately separate.
What Helps Recovery
Forgiveness is the single strongest predictor of relationship stability after infidelity. Studies show that 80% of partners who genuinely forgive remain married after five years. This doesn't mean forgetting or excusing—it means releasing the desire for revenge and choosing to move forward.
Other factors associated with successful recovery include:
Both partners viewing the affair as a shared problem rather than solely the unfaithful partner's fault
The unfaithful partner taking full responsibility without making excuses or blaming the betrayed spouse
Complete transparency moving forward, including access to phones, accounts, and schedules
Willingness to examine what wasn't working in the relationship before the affair
Professional guidance from a therapist experienced in infidelity recovery
What Hinders Recovery
Conversely, certain patterns make recovery unlikely:
Ongoing contact with the affair partner
Minimizing the betrayed partner's pain
Demanding immediate forgiveness or "getting over it"
Refusal to discuss the affair or answer questions
Blaming the betrayed partner for the unfaithful partner's choices
The Path Forward
If you're reading this article because infidelity has touched your relationship, the statistics offer both caution and hope.
The caution: infidelity causes real damage. It shatters trust, creates trauma, and fundamentally changes a relationship. Recovery isn't guaranteed, and it requires sustained effort from both partners.
The hope: most couples who commit to the healing process, especially with professional support, can not only survive but ultimately build stronger relationships. The affair, while devastating, can become a catalyst for addressing long-standing issues and creating deeper intimacy than existed before.
The research is clear that couples who work with experienced therapists have significantly better outcomes than those who try to navigate this crisis alone. If you're in the Roseville area and facing infidelity in your relationship, reaching out for professional support is the most evidence-based step you can take.
Prevention: Protecting Your Marriage
For couples who haven't experienced infidelity but want to protect their relationship, the research points to several protective factors:
Maintain emotional intimacy: Regular, meaningful conversations about feelings, dreams, and concerns
Address problems early: Don't let resentments build; seek help at the first signs of persistent conflict
Nurture your sexual connection: Physical intimacy matters, and both partners should feel comfortable discussing needs and desires
Develop strong communication skills: The ability to navigate difficult conversations is protective
Build individual strength: Partners who maintain their own identity, friendships, and interests are less vulnerable to seeking validation elsewhere
Create transparency: Openness about friendships, work relationships, and online activities builds trust
These aren't guarantees—no relationship is affair-proof. But couples who actively invest in their connection create relationships where infidelity becomes less appealing and less likely.
Conclusion
Infidelity affects roughly one in five marriages—significant, but not the epidemic some portray. When it does occur, the majority of couples can recover, especially with professional help. The research consistently shows that honest disclosure, genuine forgiveness, and skilled therapeutic support create the conditions for healing.
Whether you're working to affair-proof your marriage or navigating the painful aftermath of betrayal, understanding these statistics can help you make informed decisions about your relationship's future.
The numbers tell us that hope is reasonable—but that hope must be paired with action, honesty, and often professional guidance to translate into lasting recovery.
James Christensen is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in couples therapy in Roseville, California. He helps couples navigate relationship challenges including communication issues, trust repair, and recovery from infidelity.
Sources: Institute for Family Studies, General Social Survey, American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, Couples Academy, The Marriage Restoration Project
