Written Mental Dialogues

This is a visualization exercise that can help you think more clearly and communicate better with your partner. It’s a way to practice talking clearly to someone about how they have treated you in the past, and about how they are treating you now. 

For your first dialogue, imagine talking to one of your parents about something they did that had a negative impact on you. It can be something from childhood, or something more recent. Think about the biggest problem you have in your relationship with this person, and then zoom into one example of that problem. Visualize what would happen if you talked straight to them about that example, and about the problem more generally. 

Start the conversation by saying “I want to talk to you about. . .” 

The point is not to convince the person that you are right, but to show them that you can see what they did in the past and what they are doing right now. You are practicing a new way of communicating, where talk straight to someone without being mean. 

Remember:

1.  Visualize everything before you write it

2.  Reveal what you see and what you want, don’t try to convince

3.  Don’t try to make your first draft perfect, this is an iterative process. 

Email me your dialogue at james.m.christensen@gmail.com. I will send you feedback and suggestions.